Is 15 the new 2?

Terrible 2's? I say terrible teens. I am going to either lose my hair, or look like the female version of Steve Martin. His hair has been completely white since he was what? Maybe 30? Well, I am a titch older than that, but still you get the picture.

My poor girl. I don't understand how someone who is so loved can be so completely miserable. She says she hates her dad(which I believe), her sisters(which I don't believe) and me(which I believe about 25% of the time). She is grounded for doing something she shouldn't have and instead of dealing with the punishment, she is instead blaming me. She made the bad decision that lead to her getting in trouble. Does she not see this? I have been making excuses for her behavior for the past year since her dad moved out. However, I can't make excuses forever. She has to own it. Her behavior, her attitude, her anger. I really hate having to punish this child. It makes her miserable, which in turn makes me(and her sisters) miserable. If I had the money I would put her in therapy. I know she would fight it and the first 10 sessions or more would probably be a complete waste of money, because as stubborn as she is, she would probably sit there sulking and not talk. What can I do? I try talking to her, but either I end up in tears of frustration for not being able to get through to her or I storm out of the room with my feelings hurt. I know, I know. It's not about me. It's about her. Our entire lives are about her. Her mood holds us hostage. The air in the house fills with the tension of her anger on bad days. The hardest part of this? She is just like me. Exactly. I did all the things in high school (and got away with) that she is doing now (and getting caught!) She is a popular girl. I was a popular girl. She is a cheerleader. I was a cheerleader. I rebelled. She is rebelling. I love her. I hope she loves me.